MY LEARNING DISABLED CHILD IS NOT A BURDEN ON SOCIETY

 

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On the contrary, GG contributes significantly to the world we live in and genuinely helps to make it a better place. It would be so easy to launch into stories of inspirational Paralympians, people with Downs Syndrome running their own business, or the building evidence of genius’s and talented artists who were likely on the autism spectrum but it is so much simpler.

GG brings immense joy to our lives and to those around her, she enjoys the simple pleasures in life and reminds us what is important. GG is not encumbered by financial concerns or fears of what is happening in this world but revels in the here and now, something we can all learn from. Being able to giggle at the daft things, she keeps alive the best of toddlerhood lurking inside us all.

GG is also completely non-judgemental – she takes people as they come. Racism, ageism, fat-ism, none of this would even occur to her. GG is the only person I know who honestly has no unconscious bias.

Along with most children with disabilities, GG demonstrates a level of bravery that I could certainly only aspire to. I am ashamed to think back to the levels of complaining when I suffered with back issues on and off through my 20s. It wasn’t nice and the physio was not fun. GG does physio every day. Climbing stairs is always hard for her but she does, all the time. Epilepsy is hideous and whilst I am still recovering from the aftermath of a seizure and my reaction, GG picks herself up and carries on with her day. If the rest of the human race was half as resilient as my daughter, this world would be a much better place.

The other fabulous trait that makes me smile all the time, is a complete disregard for materialistic possessions. Don’t get me wrong, GG has many many toys as we feel compelled as parents to surround our children with gawdy plastic items. The truth however is that GG is completely happy with her baby doll, a pram and an apple. Even the tooth fairy brings chocolate to GG. Yes, she will also be entertained by the iPad but it isn’t an important factor in her life, and TV is for wimps who feel the need to sit down!

If the view of ‘contributing to society’ is obtaining a degree, having a distinguished career or excelling as a football player then no, it is unlikely that GG will do any of these things. However, for the majority of people, the important things in life are not achievement or materialistic based. Caring, sharing joy and valuing other people are what matters and GG exhibits these traits more than most.

Despite the huge progress in attitudes to disability and having come a long way from when disabled people were hidden away, it is a sad position that I, and other parents, find ourselves having this debate. However when I have heard so many challenges as to why public money should fund services to disabled children, it cannot be ignored. Early intervention, good education and enablement therapies ensure that disabled people are empowered to contribute to society so let’s fight to continue to make provision better.

 

IF THIS WERE HAPPENING TO MAINSTREAM KIDS, THERE WOULD BE UPROAR

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Imagine a world where your child does not have their basic needs met at school. You turn up one day and the staff explain, very politely and regrettably, that they cannot do what your child needs today. Would you smile back? Say that’s okay? Leave your child anyway and head off to home / work as normal? This is what the parents of disabled kids are expected to do every day.

Imagine that your child is told to stop communicating. The books are all removed from the library. The next day, there are no pens. You are reassured that the pens will be provided but only once every 6 weeks. The school does not have budget for your child to be able to communicate or learn. Core equipment, an eye gaze which allows children to communicate through eye movements, or an iPad which provides a voice for so many – not funded because there is no money.

Just imagine your child after lunch being told to sit in a corner and not take part in the class. Observe, yes. Take part, no chance. You see, there is only funding for a part time 1-2-1. Even if your child happens to have medical challenges or a lack of safety awareness, well we will take our chances rather than overspend. After all, it’s okay in the morning and that will have to be good enough.

Now, your child’s feet have grown. Clarks is available to you (other shoe shops are available) but not for at least 6 weeks. You have to squeeze your child’s feet into shoes for at least 6 weeks and by the way, you need to attend 3 appointments, all at short notice, in the middle of the day and parking costs £6 a go. Oh and be grateful you don’t have to pay for the shoes.

Imagine that you start work at 8.30am and go to drop your child at breakfast club to be told that it does not exist. Not only that, but there is no childcare at all available around school hours. In the holidays you might be offered 1 day a week – school hours only of course.

Children with different abilities will have (usually after a long fight) either a statement of needs or what is now an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP). This outlines the needs of each child and forms a legal requirement for provision. Unfortunately, there are 2 major issues. Firstly, the true needs of a child are rarely properly documented leaving gaps. Secondly, even when the needs are documented, they are not always provided. Parents will fight for the correct provision and as a result are labelled as ‘difficult’ or ‘tiger parents’.

My daughter has an undiagnosed genetic condition – known as a Swan. (Syndromes Without a Name). I have therefore become one of the ‘difficult parents’ who is continuously fighting for the basic needs of my child to be provided. I don’t want to be difficult and neither do others, but we do want to be heard. Britain in 2016 needs to think differently and we need you to help us shout it out.

If you would like to help please feel free to RT to the following people:

@PennyMordauntMP (Minister for the Disabled)

@EHRCChair (Chair of Equalities and Human Rights Commission)

@Sajidjavid (Minister for Local Government and Communities)

@JustineGreening (Minister for Equalities)